Ways to be Yourself

What happened to Filipino television and internet personality Maine Mendoza?

Other’s expectations, influences, and choices affect how we act, decide, and behave.  Sadly, some are dictated by the forces around them that they can no longer be themselves.  So bold of Maine Mendoza to stand by her beliefs, values, and principles.

Ways to be Yourself
Ways to be Yourself. Photo lifted from The Filipino Times.

The phenomenal actress of the Kapuso network admitted through an open letter to her fans that at some point in her life, she felt like “living in a box”.  She had a hard time expressing her thoughts and feelings because of the expectations set upon her.

Her letter was both emotional and honest.  One could feel that the baggage in her chest was truly heavy.  This is because she put on to herself the expectations of others.  Now, she was left tired and seeking freedom from her fans.

There are a number of individuals living in a lie and even embarrassment because they allowed others to manipulate their personality.  There are those who stand tall and still prefer to voice their own values just like what Maine did.  How do they stay connected to their true self and show their own true values?

Chase your dreams

The only person who can pull you down is yourself.  Do not let yourself nor anyone do that to you.  Align your passion with your values and standards and chase after your aspiration.  Remember, you are no longer your own identity if you chase other’s dream.

Stay grounded and connected with your dream.  But choose it carefully.   The more you pursue your interest and the more you realize them, the more you fully come to know your true self.

Dress to express

Do not dress to impress.  Instead, dress to express.  Your choice of color, style, and even language all say who you are.  You bring them out in social interactions.  Be true then to every action and word.

Remember, though, that the way you respond to the situation is what you show to the world. If someone pushes the button and you react to it, then they are controlling you. Never allow them to control you.  Dress to express but be conscious of your reaction.

Know your personal values

You are identified by the values you hold true.  You are you simply because of these values.  Stand by them, live by them, and believe in them.   It is you who you violate the most when you become untrue of your principles and standards.

Owe no one an explanation

Ways to be Yourself
Ways to be Yourself

You have your priorities in life, just the same others have their own preferences.  It would be unfair to yourself to suppress your own beliefs just to pretend you support others.  It would be unfair to them as well.

You need not explain nor apologize for your preference.  Yours are what you align with your core standards and personal values.   You may gracefully show your disagreement on things as it is again reflective of your character and preference.  After all, we are all unique individuals with different values, aspirations, and priorities.

Ways to be Yourself

You are yourself because of your unique values, set of aspirations, and way of expression.  Be true to yourself by living these, not to impress but to express yourself.

It may hold true that during our formative years, we have no idea who we actually are.  Or at least clueless who we will become.  A number of us even struggle with our own identity issues.  But as we grow, we find our voice.

Ways to be Yourself
Ways to be Yourself

Do not be who you are not by living to the expectation of others.  Be bold to express your true self.  After all, despite the effort to keep them just to please others, your true identity will show.  It is because your set of principles, own standards, and the way you express are uniquely yours.  So stand up and be proud of yourself.

And to Maine Mendoza, may she find the freedom she very well deserves, move on, stay grounded, and be very much herself.

Berlin Domingo

Devoted. Compassionate. Instinctive. Berlin loves to write personal narratives, thrilling discoveries, and mommy tips that make daily living the happiest. She shares a place called the small house with her husband and their four boys.