Your man displays strange behavior and you haven’t a clue? Don’t be praning, but you mustn’t turn a blind eye either. There are new – and – old – tell – tale signs that your love is having a fling. Read on for the dead giveaways….
It used to be lipstick on his collar, strange phone calls in the middle of the night, frequent overtime work or sudden “business trips”. Or a change in his grooming routine – trying a new scent or a new haircut, or spending more time primping before the mirror. Sometimes all you had was your intuition. You were suspicious, but you couldn’t put your finger on exactly why you felt that way. But first a word of caution: if the man in your life shows one or two of these signals, he may simply be feeling under pressure from your questioning rather than outright lying about something.
His Vocal Tone – A love cheat will do the following:
He’ll try and keep his voice completely steady. This is unnatural to the way we normally speak, since our voice naturally goes up and down, slows and speeds up. But a cheat will try so hard not to sound nervous that he will keep his vocal tone in a steady drone.
Listen to see if his voice starts rising over time. As someone gets nervous – when he’s telling a lie – his vocal chords start constricting, which slightly raises the pitch of his voice. Beware, too, if he makes a tell-tale “catching” nose as he answers a question. This is where his voice catches in his throat as if he’s literally choking on his lies.
What is He Trying to Say? Look at the contents of his words. A love cheat will resort to these:
He laces his answers with loads of details. Watch it if he gives you much more details than usual because liars often do this to make a story sound credible.
He goes to the other extreme – giving you short and to-the-point answers. He’s worried that he might forget what he says to you (if he’s giving a detailed lie) and therefore he will give as brief answers as possible – shorter than he usually would.
He gets annoyed or angry when you ask questions you normally do about where he’s been, etc. – Someone who doesn’t want to get caught displays anger when he usually wouldn’t. A love cheat will want to scare you off from quizzing him further. He thinks that using this angry approach will make you decide to drop it.
He suddenly drops new places and new names into his conversations. If he’s been trying a new restaurant or bar with a “fling,” he might slip up and mention visiting that new place or even the other person’s name.
His Body Language and Behavior – It’s an age- old tell-tale sign but worth watching out for:
An experienced liar has more reason to appear up front and honest. For one, he looks you square in the eye, and latches onto your eye contact for longer than is natural.
On the other hand, a love cheat who is new in the game does the opposite. Because he’s feeling guilty, he gets jittery and avoids eye contact – or his eyes constantly flick away.
A love cheat puts on his “puppy dog eyes” look that feigns innocence. Watch for that kawawa look that seems to plead. “Come on, you can’t think little old me would do that!”
A liar uses defensive gestures like covering his mouth with his hands when speaking. Beware, too, of defensive body language like crossing his arms behind his neck and leaning backwards, away from you. This is a sign he feels threatened.
A love cheat suddenly displays new “habits”. Notice whether he’s started to trim his abs at the gym, use a new aftershave or cologne, and dress better. If this isn’t something that he’s been planning for a while and comes out of the blue, it might signal that he’s trying to look good for the other woman.
Finally, is he rejecting you in bed – or doing the opposite, which is wanting more sex than ever? – Cheaters often go to one extreme or the other. When your partner feels very guilty, he may want to sleep with you or he may want to make up for it with extra passionate sex.