Why Friends with Benefits Won’t Work


Friends with benefits seems like the best of both worlds —no commitment, a (nearly) guaranteed booty call, zero jealousy (ideally) and a companion on your own terms (for those times you need a plus one).

Friends with benefits can be a great arrangement for hot sex and low-key fun without the hassle of a serious relationship, but it can also be hard to strike the right balance between committed and no-strings-attached. A recent study published looked at the ways people communicate with their FWB and what might contribute to any problems between them.

According to previous research cited in the article, 50-60 percent of young adults have engaged in a friends-with-benefits situation with an opposite-sex friend, and 40.6 percent of them created specific “communication rules” to make sure their relationship stays within its bounds. Sounds responsible enough, right? But let’s be real: Communication is hard in any relationship, so you can imagine all the ways it might break down in a bond that’s a little bit trickier to navigate.

Psst.ph lists down some important bad lessons you learn when you get into an FWB relationship:

That you can really have just sex

Being FWB may start off like this, but at some point, “just sex” becomes more. People are not designed to  just have detached sex. There are always strings, whether you’re aware of them or not.

That you should group all guys together in one jerk-blob

We’ve all had our fair share of jerks share of jerks. But, it’s not right to group all dudes into one group and expect one to break the mold that you have in your head. Pulling the “I thought you were different” card is a dangerous game that ultimately comes down to you managing your own expectations.

That you can’t be just vulnerable

We can’t always put up a rough exterior and says it’s a front to cover up our vulnerability. We’ve all been there, and we do this. But it’s important to remember that it’s okay to be vulnerable and trying to cover it up can actually hurt you more in the long run.

That settling is okay

We can’t all get what we want, that’s just life. But that doesn’t mean you have to settle for what you have. If you don’t want what you already have, you’re probably not very happy and need to make some changes in your life.

That you should always pull out the emotionally damaged card

Everyone is emotionally damaged by something. We’re people. We have emotions, and we get hurt. That doesn’t mean you should use it as an excuse for everything.

That you can’t be just friends

Being friends with benefits does happen pretty frequently. However, it just won’t happen because in the long run, you will its implication in your lives.

Vance Madrid

Freelance writer, lifestyle blogger, social media manager, events coordinator, scriptwriter, film buff, wanderlust and certified foodie. Zealous for a keyboard and new experiences, I wish to live and learn through my writing.