Is Confidence really the new Sexy?

I recently saw an article on another site wherein a man asked “what with your insecurities?” He couldn’t understand why women are insecure about their body flaws and why women are not comfortable in their own skin. I’m not saying that this applies to all women but it does apply to most women and I am one of them.

A lot of people talk about how confidence is the new sexy but is it really? How is it that during the show presented during the Confidence is the New Sexy launch, there were still a lot of women who were very self conscious about their flabs, thunder thighs, muffin top, and what not?

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There are 3 reasons why women are insecure:

  1. They grew up in a family where the Mom puts on lipstick just to go to the market or the Dad strives for perfection.
  2. Society tells them they are not good enough, thin enough, white enough, chic enough, classy enough, and what have you. This is a constant bombarding of what is ideal and beautiful.
  3. Negative praises. When you finally have the guts to wear that bohemian shorts and your friend tells you “Girl, so proud of you. Confidence!”

It may seem a small thing but when you’ve had years of being told these things, you tend to belive it to be true. If there is someone out there who thinks that affirmations are enough to change one’s mind, you are in for a surprise.


It’s not easy to believe that you are good enough.

Words of affirmation coupled with a lot of patience, understanding, and sheer will is needed to make someone believe that they are more than enough, that they are beautiful, that they are sexy even with flabs and all. Years and years of mind setting is the main thing that you will have to go against and it may also take years before the notion of having to be perfect goes away.

However, if brands like AVON will continue their advocacy of promoting self love and being comfortable in your own skin, then we are all one step closer to being where we all need to be. Yes, there will be a lot more moments that we won’t wear that sleeveless top because we have big arms or don on that cute bikini because we don’t have a whistle bait figure but perhaps, tomorrow, you can put on that dress that covers your flaw but flaunts a little bit of your figure. Perhaps the next week, you can wear that color you really love but everyone tells you not to wear coz you’re too dark.

Confidence is the new sexy but the road to getting there is just as sexy. It’s a work in progress but what matters is that you are in progress. Eventually, you’d have the confidence you need and deserve to have and you’ll radiate sexy like no one else can that all the body shamers wouldn’t be able to help but admire you not for being brave to wear something you shouldn’t but just admire you coz you are what they couldn’t be.

Kathy Kenny


Digital marketer. Events host. Content writer. Pursuer of dreams. Music, movie, and book lover. Collector of snowglobes, ref magnets, pens, mugs, Care Bears, notebooks, and makeup. Wanderlust. Sapiosexual. Yawyan Advocate.