Things might have been going great for you. You might have had your eyes for someone for a long time now, then he also realized that he’s had feelings for you too, and you started to date. It should be a happy ending, right? That’s not always the case. While you might be happy with your relationship with this guy, you might feel a bit anxious or uncomfortable, and you’re not sure why. It could be that you’re afraid of committing. This is also often the reason why millennials these days would prefer not to label their relationship for whatever fear they might have.
People who are afraid of commitment are usually thought of as the hard-partying people who love to go out every night and have difficulty thinking about being with one person. There are definitely people who fall into that category, but there are also other types. There are people who have gotten burnt in the past and are afraid of opening their hearts up again. There are others who have feelings for the new person in their lives, but they’re unsure of how much they want to sacrifice for them. But with love, as they say, you have to gamble–to see if it works or not.
If you have feelings for the person you’re dating, but you’re feeling a bit overwhelmed, you might feel uneasy about committing fully to the other person. Here, Psst.ph shares some signs to know if it’s you who’s scared of commitment. If you fit the profile, you will have to consider whether you’re truly ready for this relationship and what exactly you’re looking for from a partner.
You Don’t Like The Idea Of Your Relationship Being Labeled
When someone asks you about your relationship status, what do you usually say? Do you give some vague answer about having fun, just seeing someone, or you’re sort of single? Does the idea of saying you’re in a relationship freak you out? Does it seem like a really big step? If that’s how you feel, that’s how you feel. You don’t necessarily have to put a label on your relationship if you and your guy doesn’t want to. But, you should also understand why you don’t want your relationship labeled. Is it something that you and your guy has talked about and agreed early on? Think about whether it’s because of the connection (or lack thereof) you have with him, or whether it’s an individual thing.
You’re still hurting from past relationships
You need to be truly honest here. Have you totally moved on from your last relationship? It doesn’t help if you’re lying to yourself. You might not feel ready to commit to your current SO because you’re still holding on to some part of the past. Rebound relationships are a big no-no. They’re very unfair not only to yourself but also to your partner. Hearts take time to heal and everyone’s journey is different. Don’t put pressure on yourself or jump into anything you’re not ready for. You might regret it.
You Get Overwhelmed When He Talks About Your Future Together
When he talks about your future together, does it adds more to your anxiety? If you’re nodding yes, it can point to a commitment issue. It can also speak that you may be the type of person who enjoys living in the present. So you may not be eager for any grand commitments in the near future because it tends to overwhelm you.
You focus on the negative things a bit too much
Do you sometimes look for the negative things in relationships? Do you look for his flaws, quirks, or differences in the hopes that you can use them as a way out? If you think you are, consider why. Do you actually want to be in this relationship? Do you actually have feelings for him? Or, do you feel pressured? Are you committing because you think that’s what you’re supposed to be doing or because people are encouraging you to? Remember that you’re the other person in this relationship. At the end of the day, the only opinion you should be listening to is your own.
You sometimes leave his texts unanswered
Some people love to spend the day texting their special someone. Do you find it a bit ridiculous? If he texts you, do you sometimes ignore the text or leave it unanswered until later so you can do your own thing? Do you cringe at seeing the text because you know it could open up the gates for a back-and-forth texting marathon? If you don’t like the idea of committing to texting marathons you might not like the idea of committing to him, in general.
You’re actually holding back to him
Do you find it difficult to open up yourself to your partner? Do you tend to hold things back? If this is so, there really is something wrong. While there’s nothing wrong with not feeling totally 100% comfortable opening up to someone, you should consider this if you’re really ready to fully commit yourself to him or her. The best part of being in a relationship is when you can be your authentic self around your significant other without fear of being judged.
You feel like you want and need more space
Think about how much space he gives you. Now, consider whether you think it’s enough. If you’ve asked him for more space and it still isn’t enough, it could be a sign that you’re not ready for a proper commitment at this stage in your life. It could also indicate that your feelings for him aren’t strong enough for a commitment.